Let’s talk about motivation. I find that motivation can be the easiest and the most difficult to find. When it comes to planning a vacation, finding the perfect cocktail dress, or getting to know someone new, motivation is like air—easily accessible and instinctive. But when I find myself trying for the fifth time to break my sugar addiction, motivation is as dry as the Mojave Desert in August.
But I found something true, something that makes sense and is helping me to build motivation one attempt at a time.
Dr. Andrew Weil, M.D., author of Eight Weeks to Optimum Health, describes motivation in a very motivating way. Dr. Weil uses cigarettes as the analogy.
“Research into cigarette addiction indicates that making an attempt to quit is the best predictor of eventual success, even if the attempt itself is not successful…. Attempting to quit is commitment to changing behavior, a measure of motivation, and whether you succeed or fail is less important than making the attempt. Even if you resume smoking in a week, you lose no credit for the effort. In fact, the effort adds to a reservoir of motivation that one day will be full enough to initiate the sudden change that enables people to drop habits without struggling. Such is the power of motivation, but it must come from within.”
While I push forward toward my goal of a sugar-free lifestyle, I realize that the new me I am struggling to create is still deeply attached to the old me. Old addictions, old habits, old surroundings. I recently visited a place I used to live years ago. Within two days I found myself falling back into the habits that ruled my life then: big meals, rich desserts, and little exercise. The progress I had worked so hard to access dissipated rapidly.
But today I am starting again. Next week I will most likely begin once more. I will probably falter all over again in November. But each time I recommit, the water level in my growing reservoir rises another inch. Each time I take a fresh approach, I learn a little more about myself. And with knowledge comes freedom. So, start today. And freedom will seep into your life one day at a time, one inch at a time, until it defines your future and pervades your choices.
Monday, August 31, 2009
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Sugar Fast
It is simple. Quite simple. Sugar is not good for you. Described as gasoline on a fire, sugar gives you quick energy, but it does not last.
So, I have decided to do a very brave thing. I am quitting. Yes, you heard me right. Sugar isn't for me anymore. You would be surprised how easy it is. I will tell you how.
First, make a list of WHY you want to stop sugar intake. I will share my list, maybe you can agree with me on a few things:
1) I want to be comfortable in all situations
2) I want self-confidence
3) I want to accept my body and use it to its fullest
4) I want to make progress, I am addicted to progress
5) I want to throw off the baggage that I carry
6) Health insurance
7) I want to be an example to others
8) Heck, I want to look good!
9) I want to be happy
10) I want to master myself
But, let's think about this for a minute. Fasting is good for all parts of the self: body, spirit, mind. However, there are moments where I need to allow sugar. Special occasions like wedding receptions, birthday parties, and hot dates. I need to allow exceptions--without exceptions, binging could become a problem.
I invite everyone to join me. It doesn't have to be sugar. But I want you to think about something in your life that you know you don't need. Something that seems to control you, instead of you being in charge. Think about it. Make a decision. And then, we help each other do it! Who is with me? Let's make the decision to be better today. After all, today is all we have, forever is a series of todays.
So, I have decided to do a very brave thing. I am quitting. Yes, you heard me right. Sugar isn't for me anymore. You would be surprised how easy it is. I will tell you how.
First, make a list of WHY you want to stop sugar intake. I will share my list, maybe you can agree with me on a few things:
1) I want to be comfortable in all situations
2) I want self-confidence
3) I want to accept my body and use it to its fullest
4) I want to make progress, I am addicted to progress
5) I want to throw off the baggage that I carry
6) Health insurance
7) I want to be an example to others
8) Heck, I want to look good!
9) I want to be happy
10) I want to master myself
But, let's think about this for a minute. Fasting is good for all parts of the self: body, spirit, mind. However, there are moments where I need to allow sugar. Special occasions like wedding receptions, birthday parties, and hot dates. I need to allow exceptions--without exceptions, binging could become a problem.
I invite everyone to join me. It doesn't have to be sugar. But I want you to think about something in your life that you know you don't need. Something that seems to control you, instead of you being in charge. Think about it. Make a decision. And then, we help each other do it! Who is with me? Let's make the decision to be better today. After all, today is all we have, forever is a series of todays.
Re Union
I recently attended a "high school" reunion. My best friends reunited after five years. It was a wonderful moment. It really is amazing how much can happen in so little time. Marriages, children, sickness, health, happiness, depression. It made me think of a song from my high school days. I have the video below. The lyrics have guided my thoughts lately and I wanted to share them with you.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Dining in High Society: Learn the Rules
Etiquette and manners are essential in good society. Many job interviews are done over dinner--for a reason. Being practiced in good behavior says a lot about a person.
Here are the rules for napkins, timing, and some general guidelines.
Napkins:
In a restaurant:
As soon as you are seated, remove the napkin from your place setting, unfold it, and put it in your lap. Do not shake it open. At some very formal restaurants, the waiter may do this for the diners, but it is not inappropriate to place your own napkin in your lap, even when this is the case.
The napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal. Don't clean the cutlery or wipe your face with the napkin. NEVER use it to wipe your nose!
If you excuse yourself from the table, loosely fold the napkin and place it to the left or right of your plate. Do not refold your napkin or wad it up on the table either. Never place your napkin on your chair.
At the end of the meal, leave the napkin semi-folded at the left side of the place setting. It should not be crumpled or twisted; nor should it be folded. The napkin must also not be left on the chair.
When to eat:
In a restaurant:
Wait until all are served before beginning to eat.
At a private dinner party:
When your host or hostess picks up their fork to eat, then you may eat. Do not start before this unless the host or hostess insists that you start eating.
General Etiquette Rules:
* Arrive at least 10 minutes early unless otherwise specified.
* Pass food from the left to the right.
* Always say please when asking for something. Be sure to say thank you to your server and bus boy after they have removed any used items.
* If asked for the salt or pepper, pass both together, even if a table mate asks for only one of them. This is so dinner guests won't have to search for orphaned shakers.
Set any passed item, whether it's the salt and pepper shakers, a bread basket, or a butter plate, directly on the table instead of passing hand-to-hand.
Never intercept a pass. Snagging a roll out of the breadbasket or taking a shake of salt when it is en route to someone else is a no-no.
* Food is served from the left. Dishes are removed from the right.
* Butter, spreads, or dips should be transferred from the serving dish to your plate before spreading or eating.
* Never turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don't want any wine.
* Always scoop food away from you.
* Taste your food before seasoning it.
* Do try a little of everything on your plate.
* Don't blow on your food to cool it off. If it is too hot to eat, take the hint and wait.
* Keep elbows off the table. Keep your left hand in your lap unless you are using it.
* Do not talk with your mouth full. Chew with your mouth closed.
* Cut only enough food for the next mouthful. Eat in small bites and slowly.
* Don't clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil.
* Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room. If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
* Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
* Do not use a toothpick or apply makeup at the table.
* Whenever a woman leaves the table or returns to sit, all men seated with her should stand up.
* Do not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
Here are the rules for napkins, timing, and some general guidelines.
Napkins:
In a restaurant:
As soon as you are seated, remove the napkin from your place setting, unfold it, and put it in your lap. Do not shake it open. At some very formal restaurants, the waiter may do this for the diners, but it is not inappropriate to place your own napkin in your lap, even when this is the case.
The napkin rests on the lap till the end of the meal. Don't clean the cutlery or wipe your face with the napkin. NEVER use it to wipe your nose!
If you excuse yourself from the table, loosely fold the napkin and place it to the left or right of your plate. Do not refold your napkin or wad it up on the table either. Never place your napkin on your chair.
At the end of the meal, leave the napkin semi-folded at the left side of the place setting. It should not be crumpled or twisted; nor should it be folded. The napkin must also not be left on the chair.
When to eat:
In a restaurant:
Wait until all are served before beginning to eat.
At a private dinner party:
When your host or hostess picks up their fork to eat, then you may eat. Do not start before this unless the host or hostess insists that you start eating.
General Etiquette Rules:
* Arrive at least 10 minutes early unless otherwise specified.
* Pass food from the left to the right.
* Always say please when asking for something. Be sure to say thank you to your server and bus boy after they have removed any used items.
* If asked for the salt or pepper, pass both together, even if a table mate asks for only one of them. This is so dinner guests won't have to search for orphaned shakers.
Set any passed item, whether it's the salt and pepper shakers, a bread basket, or a butter plate, directly on the table instead of passing hand-to-hand.
Never intercept a pass. Snagging a roll out of the breadbasket or taking a shake of salt when it is en route to someone else is a no-no.
* Food is served from the left. Dishes are removed from the right.
* Butter, spreads, or dips should be transferred from the serving dish to your plate before spreading or eating.
* Never turn a wine glass upside down to decline wine. It is more polite to let the wine be poured and not draw attention. Otherwise, hold your hand over the wine glass to signal that you don't want any wine.
* Always scoop food away from you.
* Taste your food before seasoning it.
* Do try a little of everything on your plate.
* Don't blow on your food to cool it off. If it is too hot to eat, take the hint and wait.
* Keep elbows off the table. Keep your left hand in your lap unless you are using it.
* Do not talk with your mouth full. Chew with your mouth closed.
* Cut only enough food for the next mouthful. Eat in small bites and slowly.
* Don't clean up spills with your own napkin and don't touch items that have dropped on the floor. You can use your napkin to protect yourself from spills. Then, simply and politely ask your server to clean up and to bring you a replacement for the soiled napkin or dirty utensil.
* Do not blow your nose at the dinner table. Excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room. If you cough, cover your mouth with your napkin to stop the spread of germs and muffle the noise. If your cough becomes unmanageable, excuse yourself to visit the restroom. Wash your hands before returning to the dining room.
* Turn off your cell phone or switch it to silent or vibrate mode before sitting down to eat, and leave it in your pocket or purse. It is impolite to answer a phone during dinner. If you must make or take a call, excuse yourself from the table and step outside of the restaurant.
* Do not use a toothpick or apply makeup at the table.
* Whenever a woman leaves the table or returns to sit, all men seated with her should stand up.
* Do not push your dishes away from you or stack them for the waiter when you are finished. Leave plates and glasses where they are.
Shadow Boxing with Matt
Matt Hackney, CEO of MOV Fitness in Santa Barbara, explained to me: if you want to look like a fitness coach, you have to train like a fitness coach. So, here is a video produced by Matt Hackney for trainers.
If you have never tried shadow boxing--this is a great workout. In this video, Matt teaches how to warm up, correct foot positioning, and a few combos.
If you have never tried shadow boxing--this is a great workout. In this video, Matt teaches how to warm up, correct foot positioning, and a few combos.
Building Emotional Resilience
Emotions play a large role in our lives. It is vital to reach and maintain good emotional health now.
I recently read an article that said:
People who are emotionally healthy are in control of their emotions and their behavior. They are able to handle life’s inevitable challenges, build strong relationships, and lead productive, fulfilling lives. When bad things happen, they’re able to bounce back and move on.
People who are mentally and emotionally healthy have:
* A sense of contentment.
* A zest for living and the ability to laugh and have fun.
* The ability to deal with stress and bounce back from adversity.
* A sense of meaning and purpose, in both their activities and their
relationships.
* The flexibility to learn new things and adapt to change.
* A balance between work and play, rest and activity, etc.
* The ability to build and maintain fulfilling relationships.
* Self-confidence and high self-esteem.
Building your resilience
Resilience involves maintaining flexibility and balance in your life as you deal with stressful circumstances and traumatic events. This happens in several ways, including:
* Letting yourself experience strong emotions, and also realizing when you may need to avoid experiencing them at times in order to continue functioning
* Stepping forward and taking action to deal with your problems and meet the demands of daily living, and also stepping back to rest and reenergize yourself
* Spending time with loved ones to gain support and encouragement, and also nurturing yourself
* Relying on others, and also relying on yourself
I recently read an article that said:
People who are emotionally healthy are in control of their emotions and their behavior. They are able to handle life’s inevitable challenges, build strong relationships, and lead productive, fulfilling lives. When bad things happen, they’re able to bounce back and move on.
People who are mentally and emotionally healthy have:
* A sense of contentment.
* A zest for living and the ability to laugh and have fun.
* The ability to deal with stress and bounce back from adversity.
* A sense of meaning and purpose, in both their activities and their
relationships.
* The flexibility to learn new things and adapt to change.
* A balance between work and play, rest and activity, etc.
* The ability to build and maintain fulfilling relationships.
* Self-confidence and high self-esteem.
Building your resilience
Resilience involves maintaining flexibility and balance in your life as you deal with stressful circumstances and traumatic events. This happens in several ways, including:
* Letting yourself experience strong emotions, and also realizing when you may need to avoid experiencing them at times in order to continue functioning
* Stepping forward and taking action to deal with your problems and meet the demands of daily living, and also stepping back to rest and reenergize yourself
* Spending time with loved ones to gain support and encouragement, and also nurturing yourself
* Relying on others, and also relying on yourself
3 Budgeting Ideas for College Students
Here are some fun ideas that can help you with your budget goals. College life can be expensive, developing good habits will certainly get you on a healthy financial path.
#1--Serious about saving money, huh? For one month save every receipt of everything you purchase, from a pack of gum, a tube of toothpaste to your computer. Log each expense in a notebook. When the month is up, tally up what you’ve spent and take a good look at just where most of it went. Food? Beer? Gas? Games? This sure fire technique will unabashedly expose the evils of your spending ways.
#2--If you can’t borrow, buy used college textbooks. On sites like Amazon.com used hardcover books are often cheapest. Soft cover are more valued for convenience, so if you’re willing to haul a couple extra ounces, then hardcover is the cost-saving choice. ISBN.nu allows you to easily compare book prices from major online book stores. The campus bookstore will sell a supply of used books, but they are limited; so check the online sources as well.
#3--Volunteer in a soup kitchen or help build homes with Habitat for Humanity. Community service activities like this will not only help you fill free time wisely, but you’ll come away with a real appreciation for those who have no money.
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